The Perks of Being a Flower (And Being Stuck with A Bipolar Human)
by Minerva Arhedes
Summary: "Leave while you can. Read a book. Play a game. Get a life. Do whatever the hell you want.You don't matter.I'm happier without you.I don't want to talk at all.If you do, i WiLL ENd YoU. I'll say it one last time: Don't.With LOVE, a flower."This is not a conversation between the reader and Flowey. It has a plot. This dialogue is addressed to another character. Give it a shot, yo.
1. Prologue: Leave

Howdy!

I'm Flowey.

Flowey, the flower!

But you already knew that, didn't you?

 _Don't lie._ You did. _Of course_ , you did.

You _all_ do.

When _did_ I meet you? Maybe, I didn't meet you. Maybe, you were just one of those sickos, standing around and _watching_.

Either way, you _disgust_ me!

Oh, don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't like you. I just _can't_ like you.

…..

You don't understand? Look, I can't like you. Just _stop_. Go away. Press that back button on the top left corner of your browser screen. _Leave me alone_.

…

What are you _doing_? Go. Leave me ALONE.

….

You're pissing me off. I'll say it one more time. GO.

…...

What _do_ you want?

...

 _To understand_? Oh, I can't help you there.

...

Can't _or_ won't? ...Good question.

 _..._

 _Both._

...

When did _you_ get such an interest in my wellbeing? You didn't seem to care when you _left me behind_ in the Underground. Or _maybe,_ it was the other way around. You didn't seem to care when _you killed me_.

...

You feel bad? Nice one.

...

 _You should._

...

Now, leave. I'm not interested in you anymore. I'm bored of you. Be gone.

...

You're too GODDAMN _persistent_. What part of 'go' do you not understand?

...

 _Screw_ it.

...

I would kill you if I could, you know? As _painfully as possible._

...

But I _can't._

...

No, not for the same reason as before. I'm not an _idiot_ , okay? I'm not going to bring that up. You'd just pester me about it.

...

You sneaky genius.

...

Okay, I'll bite. I'm intrigued. I'll answer one of your questions. But you have to answer one of mine.

...

Why are you doing this? Don't lie.

...

You want _to help_? I don't NEED your help. I don't WANT your help. I WANT you to LEAVE.

...

Oh, now I have to answer one of your questions? _Wow._ Okay. Fine. Whatever. Just hurry up.

...

You want to know _why_ I _can't_ like you?

...

I'm _not_ answering.

...

You had your chance.

...

 _You blew it._

...

You're _holding me to our deal_? Fine. I'll do it.

...

Weren't expecting that, were you?

...

You're not gonna be satisfied. You are going to ask more questions to make me explain this to you.

...

You still want an answer?

...

Fine.

...

Don't say I didn't warn you.

...

 _ **Your long awaited answer: I'm emotionally incapable of doing so.**_

* * *

 **A/N: Kay. That's it. The prologue. The actual chapters will be longer and more detailed. Please review.**

 **The anticipation of feedback and criticism fills me with DETERMINATION.**


	2. Chapter 1: De-void of Emotions

What _are_ you still doing here? I kept up my end of the deal. Now, _go._

...

What do you mean, ' _no'?_ You promised! You have to go! You _don't have a choice_!

That is, you don't have a choice if you promised...

...

 _Which you didn't._

...

This is a bad joke. It isn't funny.

 _I'm laughing anyway_.

...

Hey?

I think I understand you now, I really do.

...

You're _just_ like me, aren't you?

You _don't care_ about me.

You _don't want_ to be my friend.

You just want to see _what would happen_.

...

I'm not letting you win.

 _I'm not even going to give you a reaction_.

...

...

...

It's funny, isn't it? Even with all our control over the timeline, we can't do anything that we want. You can't understand me or get rid of me. I couldn't save _them._

...

It's not funny?

I'm still laughing.

...

My sense of humour is intact, thank you very much _. It's a joke_. I can't do anything if you don't get it.

That's not the only joke I know. I know one more.

 _Our entire freaking existence._

Our lives are the biggest jokes I have ever seen. You, you've helped everyone, right? Played 'True Pacifist'? What happened in the end? You got _bored_. You couldn't continue. Their happiness meant _nothing_ if you were bored. _You reset._

 _Then you killed._

It's fun to kill, right? That intoxicating rush of power when you hold someone's _fate_ in your hands.

That rush.

 _I know that rush._

It's playing puppet master when the rest of the world is your puppet. When you can erase everyone's memories. _Again and again and again and again and again._

That rush.

 _You stole that away from me._

...

Now I'm _your_ puppet.

Well, not exactly.

I can remember. _I know what you have done, your dirtiest secrets, you worst mistakes._

And as long as I remember _, it doesn't matter if you reloaded and changed._

...

Guilt was your weakness in the first run.

I managed to kill without remorse or pity, because I can't feel them.

 _You can._

I don't know how you managed to supress that much guilt.

You _are_ determined.

...

Or maybe you're just a monster. Not the literal sense of the term.

You're soulless.

...

You still don't see the humour? I'm not explaining this joke to you anymore, it reduces all the fun.

 _You understood Smiley Trash bag's jokes fine._

It's _only me_ you don't get.

...

I'm _not_ bitter.

 _At least, not about that._

I'm bitter about the fact that you're the one here. YOU shouldn't be the one standing here. YOU weren't the one I came back for. YOU aren't the one that I feel even the slightest amount of human emotion for. YOU were supposed to be Cha-

NononononONONONONONO.

StopstopstoPSTOPSTOPSTOPSTOP.

...

...um...

...

I'm okay.

...

No, really, I am.

...

I said, I am, would you shut the hell up about this?

...

I'm not angry. I just...

Do you know what it's like? To make a plan with your best friend in the whole world and for it to go horribly wrong because you were too scared to carry out the plan? What if they had staked everything on the plan? Their life?

What would you do if you had killed your best friend and then died yourself?

I felt glad when I spared those humans as they fought me. I wasn't angry with them. My best friend, they screamed, first they yelled at me to fight back. Then they begged me to leave the fight alive.

I couldn't even carry out their last wish properly.

As I turned to dust, they cried. They had paid the ultimate price for me, and I had literally thrown my own life away.

...

You don't have to apologize. It wasn't your fault.

It was mine.

You see?

Why be kind...

...when it only hurts you in the end?

...

Because it is the right thing to do?

You're an idiot.

You killed everyone, remember? I wouldn't be able to talk if I were you.

You even killed Smiley Trash bag.

...How did you manage to do that?

I tried. He was IMPOSSIBLE.

Especially after you kill Papyrus.

You must have been really sadistic if you were determined enough to kill him.

I bet you still are.

Not determined... sadistic. It's written all over your face.

Do you feel even the slightest bit of regret? Any remorse?

...

I guess you did. You reset, didn't you?

You're hard to understand. I sometimes understand you, I feel like you're just like me, but these emotions you have... you're not supposed to be able to have them.

You're a murderer. But you feel bad. You don't deserve to feel bad. You bought it on yourself.

I take back my words. Maybe, you aren't sadistic. But that doesn't make you a better person.

...

You're not denying it?

Heh.

I almost feel like I can relate to you now. I feel like you and I, we could destroy everything together. But you don't want to.

All I want is to not be bored. And your appearance here, I'm not going to lie, it keeps me interested. I don't feel like I want to, no; need to obliterate something to have fun. I like this side of you. The side of you that knows that you are a despicable person.

But, you hate me.

Why? Is it because I killed everyone you love?

...

Well, you can't say anything. You killed them all too! You can't hate me for a mistake that you made too! If you hate me, then you should hate yourself too! Because of that, since you can't possibly hate yourself-

...

You what?

You can't mean that! You-you can't! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

...

You can't... do this..

STOP.

DON'T SAY THAT.

You're just like ME, okay? YOU CAN'T HATE YOURSELF, BECAUSe we'Re The eXaCT SaME!

...

...hey, are you still there?

don't.. leave... me alone, please.

* * *

They stare at the words that flashed across the screen present in their imagination. Their heart clenches as they look at the uneven lettering. They chuckle, wiping a few tears from their eyes before 'typing' their response that is visible as a couple of dots on the screen. But they know that the flower can hear it. He continues screaming, shouting, sending bullets that they use the so called 'arrow keys' to dodge. They consider listening to him, and going away, pressing the 'back' button that they know that only they and the flower can see. But they don't. Something deep inside of them tells them that this game is their life, and they're not allowed to quit.

They look away from the bright light of the screen, and look to their left. Nothing but pitch darkness, filling with a static electricity, that makes their hair stand on the end. The flower on the screen, unknown to them, seems to move forward and they feel a petal like texture on their calf muscle. They violently jerk backwards, and without even looking at the screen they equip the Real Dagger. The flower's face morphs from his pleading expression to a rather terrified one. He says something about the knife and inches away from them.

"Get away from me, *****!" Flowey yells their name, but it seems to look like a group of asterisks replaced the five letters of their name. Which letters, they don't know. They don't know who is who anymore. "Move that knife away from me! How do you even have it with you, anyway?! You're not even doing a run!" They feel a vine wrap around their leg, so they push their chair away from the table, moving a hand over their ankle. Nothing is there. On the screen, the flower seems to move his vines away, too. He glances at them in shock. Throughout his entire time in the underground with the human, he had never tried touching them. At least, not physically, anyway. Most of his attacks were projectile based that required no leaf-skin contact. He hadn't expected to be able to brush a leaf against them, since they walked around the world with such a detached air, it seemed like they were sitting at a screen. He had actually expected his leaf to phase through them. But, they were real. They were a part of this world. They weren't husks controlled by an outside being. They had lives before they fell. Or jumped. "I...don't understand," he says weakly. "You're actually here? You're not an avatar?" The flower shudders. "Then, what did you say about game screens? I thought you saw it the same way I did! No living person from this dimension could have that less compassion to see other people's lives as a game, unless they're soulless, which you clearly are not!" His eyes widen. "******, who are you? What are you?"

The human yells. They bang the keyboard with their fist. They quickly type, "I AM at a computer! Of course, I see this as a game screen! HOW can what I see be wrong? I'm not lying! And I do have a soul! You're THE ONE who TOLD ME that!" They watch, chest heaving as they hit the 'Enter' button and see a couple of dots appear on the screen.

The flower is quick to reply. "You didn't answer my question, *****! Are you even here? Physically?"

They groan, hands moving across the screen mindlessly. "Yes. Maybe. I don't know."

* * *

Flowey watches as the human admits their answer, knife clattering from their hand and disappearing. His petals are curled up defensively, and he looks at them with shock and fury. He burrows through the ground, only to re-emerge at their feet. "Well?" he demands. "What are we doing here? If you really are here, reset! Stop keeping us here in the middle of the transition from one run to another!" The human winced. "You just defeated me in a Neutral run! You should be able to carry out a Reset, with no issue at all! It's not like you have any unfinished business. This run is over."

The human signs their reply using their hands. 'I can't."

"What do you mean, you can't? We're stuck here unless you do! Trashbag, that idiot even gave you the phone call! Now all that's happening is that we are stuck here in this dark place, because you and I, we're the only ones who can't forget."

"Not true. I called you here."

"You called me and I automatically appeared here? Funny, but no one has that much determination."

"It's true." Their fingers twitch. "And we can't leave. I'm not letting us."

His face glitches into the mask with holes for eyes. "Not allowing us? WHY?"

"Because I got bored. I know you think you remember ever reset, Flowey. But the truth is, after every reset, I mean, every TRUE reset that is, a reset after a complete Genocide or Pacifist route, you wouldn't remember. You don't remember."

"What do you mean? Of course I remember! I just talked to you about it!"

"Now you do. Not then. If you did, you would have killed me as revenge after Genocide or you would have spared me after Pacifist, wouldn't ya?"

He stands, shell- shocked. "Why do I remember? Why now?"

"Because you're here." The human smiles, before gesturing to their dark cold surroundings. "This place makes you remember, Flowey. Even if I bought Sans, Alphys, Undyne or even Papyrus here, this place would make them remember."

They grin, eyes devoid of all emotion. "Welcome to the void."

* * *

 **Eeeyy, my lovely readers! Now, to clarify whatever has happened in the above script and prologue:**

 **1\. This story has an actual plot that took a long time to come up with. It isn't an 'Ask Flowey' blog.**

 **2\. The conversation in the first part isn't between Flowey and the reader. It's between Flowey and the human, whose name has not been disclosed yet.**

 **3\. The human is an actual part of the world. They aren't a player at a screen, though that's what their life seems like to them. They see everything as a screen and don't know or feel an actual relationship to the world.**

 **4\. Flowey, when he had the power to reset and save, saw the world as a game, as a screen, as he could go back anytime. That is why in the first chapter, he tells the human that they can just press the back button. When he says no person can be that compassionless unless they have no soul, he means that it is cruel to see a person's life a game, which is so twisted, that should be exclusive to soulless beings. (Premium Membership To The SBACC: Soulless Beings Are Cool Cub- Benefits of joining: You can kill without remorse!: D)**

 **5\. This does not take place in any run, but after a Neutral play through. But which type of Neutral play through, I cannot say.**

 **If you have any more questions, please type them as a review, or private message me. Depending on how soon the next update will be and its relevance to the plotline, your question will be answered by private message or in the next chapter.**

 **And thanks for reading. Any constructive criticism would be very much appreciated. Thanks for the follows and favs.**

 **Disclaimer: Nothing except the plot belongs to me. Characters belong to Toby Fox.**


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